Monthly archive

July 2009

Friday, July 31, 2009

In which it's de-lurk day!

Lately I've run into loads of people who mention that they read the blog, but they've never commented. Well, today is the day! Every so often I try to coax the lurkers to leave a quick comment. I love to hear from folks who hang out here, both regular commenters and those of you who are too busy or shy or disinclined to identify yourselves. So, in the interest of luring you out to play, I'm taking questions! Whatever you'd like to know about writing, my books, etc. Ask away, and I'll blog the answers over the next few days. (If you don't have a question, feel free just to wave "hi" or keep to yourself if you're in a bashful mood. And thanks for dropping by the blog!)
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Thursday, July 30, 2009

In which I'm flogging a product

Something I don't do very often, but I am smitten, SMITTEN, I tell you. I've moaned before about the high cost of dry cleaning and not having any "green" dry cleaners in my town. (Thus the $60 Rowenta steamer from Target that was WELL worth the money.) After RWA, I had an entire shopping bag of things to take to the dry cleaners--two silk dresses--one with a heavily-beaded neckline, two cocktail dresses--one with a silver lace slip, the other with a thickly-sequinned neckline, a pashmina, a scarf, and an evening gown. I did the math, and at the rates my dry cleaner charges, it was easily over $100. Until I snagged a Dryel kit at Target and OH MY STARS. Seriously, I could not be happier. The process itself could not be simpler. Just fling the items into the big zippered Dryel bag, toss in the cleaning sheet, and bung it all in the dryer for 30 minutes. The dog could have done it. Now, one or two items will need a quick press of the iron and one or two could use a light steam, but I would have to do that anyway because the snugness of my closet tends to result in things getting a trifle creasy. But I'm not about to complain because for less than $10, I am in business. So go forth, good people, and see if Dryel will make you happy too.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009

In which I almost gave up writing

because I think I would be very good at this. The story was posted yesterday on a messageboard I frequent, and let me just say that I think professional witch is a superb career opportunity. (I would actually prefer hermit, but those openings are few and far between.) And who wouldn't love to take a goat to work?
Tuesday, July 28, 2009

In which I was feeling crabbit

Isn't that a wonderful word? Scottish. It means grumpy, and I have made it a permanent addition to my vocabulary. I'm not crabbit for any particular reason beyond the dog--who thinks it's super cool to get up at 4:30 to go out--and the weather. Me and heat, not the best of pals. And since I firmly believe that happiness is a choice, I'm choosing to be happy. What turned my mood around? A wedding processional like no other. (You may have seen this couple on the Today show last week--here's the video in its entirety. Enjoy--and mazel tov to the happy couple!)
Monday, July 27, 2009

In which I am being frugal


I realized over this weekend that I am committed to QUITE a bit of traveling in 2010. I have one re-release and two new releases which will entail some travel, two conferences, and numerous trips planned with various members of my family--I really, really should have thought this through. But none of them are trips I'm willing to give up, so the only solution is to be mindful of expenses that aren't really necessary and use those funds to get me where I need to go. One solution--the home mani/pedi. I usually get a professional one so I'll look at my spiffiest when I travel for work, but there's no reason for me to head to the salon when I'm at home writing. Last night--bereft because the Tour de France is OVER *sniffle, sniffle*--I cracked open my new bottle of Revlon Steel-Her Heart. I know matte polishes are all the rage now, but I love the very shiny pewter finish. Since I never wear gold jewelry, it is the perfect neutral for me--goes with absolutely everything!

On a personal note, I spent the weekend with my cousin Lisa. Those of you who have been hanging out at the Blog A Go-Go will remember her from my trip to Houston last year when she was receiving a bone marrow transplant. I am SO happy to tell you she is cancer-free and looks fabulous! It was wonderful to spend time with her playing tourist in my own town, although the heat has finally settled in after a very mild June. (We're in our 90-degree-days-with-stormy-evenings phase of the summer.) Anyway, we are incredibly grateful to the anonymous marrow donor in New Zealand who made the rest of her life possible.
Sunday, July 26, 2009

In which we talk scones

Ah, the scone. Heaven on a plate. I originally posted this recipe on the Blog A Go-Go on July 18, 2008. If you haven't made them, DO.



I know, it isn't soup weather, but I promise these scones would go equally well with a nice salad or some paper-thin salty ham. I just threw them together one evening when I didn't have anything in the house except a few dry ingredients and a box of soup. The scones were by far the better part of the meal. They are loosely based on the divine Whole Wheat Cherry Scones in The Skinny.

Whole Wheat Cheddar Scones

2 cups white flour (I used King Arthur White Wheat)

1 cup whole wheat flour (King Arthur again)

1 T baking powder

salt (I want to say a heaping teaspoon)

1/4 t dry mustard (Why I had a tin of Coleman's lying around I cannot imagine, but I'm sure it's Nigella's fault somehow)

palmful of dried onions (The true sign of desperate pantry cooking. I wanted fresh chives of course, but FORGOT there were some growing in the garden. So I used these dehydrated monstrosities instead, and they were actually fine. If you want a measurement, let's say a teaspoon and a half.)

two eggs

1/2 cup milk (Okay, that's a lie. It's more like 3/4 cup. It depends on your flour. Start with 1/2 and keep adding until the consistency is right. You'll want a little more milk for brushing the tops of the scones, and sour milk is excellent for baking.)

5 T butter

shredded Cheddar (A nice, sharp Cheddar, please. Two or three big palmsful.)

All of this will be much better if your ingredients are at room temperature. Preheat the oven to 450. Mix the dry ingredients, cut in the butter until the mixture is crumbly. Add the cheese and toss to coat the cheese in the flour. Then whisk together the eggs and milk and stir into the flour mixture. Bring the dough together without overworking. Turn onto a floured board and pat into a circle. Cut into eight equal wedges. Place onto parchment-lined baking sheet, brush with milk. Bake for 10-15 minutes. YUM.
Saturday, July 25, 2009

In which I'm pondering complications

I make my own life more difficult than it needs to be, of this I am certain. I do try very hard to simplify, to streamline, to cast off stress and woe. But I'm painfully aware of the fact that sometimes I get in the way of my own happiness. I recently ran across a quote from Lisa Rinna's psychic--don't judge--that I keep coming back to: You have to stop thinking that your life has to be a struggle. You don't need to struggle, that is your idea. Just open yourself, treat every day like it's new, and start it with no preconceived notions. It doesn't have to be hard to be good.
Friday, July 24, 2009

In which I adore all things English

As you well know, I am a devoted Anglophile, and one bit of England that I am completely smitten with is my friend Sali. She lives in a village with a name so perfect and twee, you'd swear Winnie-the-Pooh must be a neighbor. She collects vintage velvet coats and her cell phone likes to ring me up from her pocket so I can eavesdrop on the goings-on in Sali's life. (My favorite call came from the Milan airport where I could hear Sali working her best Italian on a Customs agent.) Sali is the friend who started up the moor behind Haworth parsonage with me, then turned back after 100 yards or so and said, "I'll be in the village having a nice cup of tea."

One of the things I love best about Sali is that she is an unrepentant history geek. (Before we'd gotten to know one another, she sent me a pamphlet on some gruesome topic. When I thanked her via e-mail I told her it would be very helpful in my work. Then she asked, "What exactly do you DO?") Her idea of fun is mentioning quite casually that she spent a morning poking around some 14th century ruin just down the road, which I must confess makes me not like her quite so much. (If I were putting together a wishlist for my ideal place to live, I can promise you a 14th century ruin would be VERY close to the top of the list.) Anyway, she is also terribly generous with links she thinks I'll like, and yesterday she sent me one on London Curiosities. She's right, I adore it, and if you're planning a trip to London soon or just want to do a little armchair traveling, do have a look.
Thursday, July 23, 2009

In which I muse on puppies


Exhausting--end of musing. I had forgotten HOW exhausting. The little miscreants have actually been pretty good about destruction, just the odd basket here and there that's been gnawed and, of course, my favorite table. It's our kitchen table and I bought it at an antiques store on Hildebrand in San Antonio. The ONE piece of furniture I would really prefer them not to put a tooth on. Anyway, it's nothing a little sanding and paint won't fix, and it doesn't bother me nearly as much as if they had gotten hold of my shoes. Emma the Yellow Wonder Dog NEVER touched shoes or clothes or books--in fact, her only destructive behavior was a section of drywall that she thought was rather tasty. It sounds bad to say your dog ate the wall, doesn't it?

But a bit of jalapeno juice changed her mind--on the advice of the vet, of course. Jalapeno juice doesn't FAZE these pups. They like it--in fact, I caught them licking off tabasco sauce and looking up expectantly for more, wagging their tails. We tried everything the vet suggested to no avail; I think they eventually got tired of chewing and have moved on to general stroppiness. Their favorite game is to pounce on each other and wrestle to the death, but we've had to put a stop to it because they were spayed and neutered last week. (Yes, while I was in DC because my husband said, "Hey, I'll be home anyway. Book the surgery and I'll take care of it." A lovely and masochistic offer that I think he deeply regretted.) Anyway, we've had to keep them separated so they won't inadvertently tear out each other's stitches, and it's KILLING them. We put them together for short periods when they're leashed, but they are desperate to play. The only safe place to let them hang out is the car. For reasons that defy explanation, they are always perfectly calm and loving to each other in the car--no barking, no pouncing, no whining. They will curl up together and groom one another and it gives us hope that ONE DAY they will be able to hang out just as nicely in the house. Maybe.

Also, I've been tinkering STILL with comments and I *think* they're fixed now...
Wednesday, July 22, 2009

In which I'm pondering self-care

Lately I've been talking to lots of women who are in desperate need of some self-care. I don't know if it's a reflection of the economy or the planetary alignments or just general busyness, but there is a great deal of putting everybody else first and it needs to stop. I'm not saying we shouldn't care for the people and responsibilities in our lives. Far from it. I'm saying we have to care for ourselves first before we can manage caring for anybody else. (Remember your friendly flight attendant and the admonition to secure your OWN oxygen mask before you try to help someone else. If you fail to do this, you could lose consciousness before you are of use to anyone. Scary, no?)

More than once in the past few weeks I've talked to women who are burned out, burned down, and running on empty. They are taking themselves and all of their commitments so seriously they've neglected themselves and they've neglected FUN. And yes, I am prescribing a little frivolity, a little selfishness because I think frivolity is essential and a small amount of well-applied selfishness is an investment against depression and burn-out. If you give and give and give until the well is dry, what's left to nourish and nurture you? And the worst part is, it's insidious. We let our boundaries slip a little at a time--an extra e-mail here, a "yes" when we long to say "no" there--and pretty soon you are overbooked, overextended, overwhelmed. If anyone presented you a list of your commitments in toto, you'd think they were barking mad. "NO woman could possibly manage all of that," you'd say scornfully. And you'd be right.

But things trickle into our lives piecemeal, and taken by themselves, none of these extra responsibilities seem so weighty. But when mountaineers climb Everest, they clip off everything that is not essential. Every extra label, unnecessary lengths of bootlace, blank pages from paperback novels. Why? Because it all adds up and because weight matters. We can only carry so much, so we need to make sure that what we carry is essential. It's time to honor the wee small voice that says, "I need a rest," and give her time to take a nap, to read a book, to sit and BE. I know women who are very busy being wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, executives, artists--but so many of them are neglecting to be SELVES.

The commitment to take care of yourself is the most important one--if you are untended, you will rebel, I promise you. You will grow crabby and impatient. You'll eat for comfort. You'll shop irresponsibly. You will snatch solace wherever you can find it, but it will not last. It won't last until you make a permanent commitment to care for yourself properly.

We have all been there at some point. We have all neglected ourselves and overextended and resented it. The only cure is to withdraw, come back to ourselves, and take inventory of what is really important. And here are some resources to help; read one or two, read them all. Take what you can use and then put it to use, I beg you. Life is either far too short or far too long to be unhappy, don't you think?
(Also, I think comments are fixed now. I've removed the captcha box, and we'll see if that makes it easier for y'all to leave comments.)

Simple Abundance Sarah Ban Breathnach
Romancing the Ordinary Sarah Ban Breathnach
The Artist's Way Julia Cameron
Vein of Gold Julia Cameron
Living Artfully Sandra Magsamen
Living a Beautiful Life Alexandra Stoddard
On Becoming Fearless Arianna Huffington
A Year by the Sea Joan Anderson
The Joy of Doing Things Badly Veronica Chambers
Hip Tranquil Chick Kimberly Wilson
Wear More Cashmere Jennifer Sander
31 Words to Create a Guilt-Free Life ed. Karen Bouris
Succulent Wild Woman SARK
Eat Mangoes Naked SARK
The Comfort Queen's Guide to Life Jennifer Louden
The 12 Secrets of Highly Creative Women Gail McMeekin
Creating a Life Worth Living Carol Lloyd
Take Time for Your Life Cheryl Richardson